<@kilolima> I've just had the worst week imaginable. <@kilolima> And the worst Saturday night I have ever experienced. Limited 420 since my friend blew me off and didn't drop off the oz that he was supposed to on thursday. <@kilolima> Spent the night crying about my dead relatives and snorting paint shaving to numb the anxiety of running out of my last spliffs. <@kilolima> well, paint shavings, chalk, vinegar and lidocaine shit someone sent me as a "fuck you" <@kilolima> Still waiting for my valium. <@kilolima> I've never had such a shrugging time. <@kilolima> My mom bought some pot from Amsterdam before she died. <@kilolima> I am saving it <@kilolima> for an absolute emergency. <@kilolima> So I am using CBD and my friend's stuff <@kilolima> if I can't get my CBD or my friends stuff or valium. <@kilolima> I resort to paint shavings before using the last my reserve <@kilolima> the anxiety about my reserves is definitely going to be what kills me. people just see pictures of privilege and shit and the reality of this life is so bad, that I would literally dream to be in Nickentina's shoes. <@kilolima> At least I can replenish 420 with production, but I cannot replenish this special 420 from amsterdam that was the last smokes picked by my mom. <@kilolima> i will literally do anything before using them reserves. <@kilolima> I rolled them this week. <@kilolima> I have them in plastic holders <@kilolima> cone holders.\\ <@kilolima> Vaccum seal isn't that nice. <@kilolima> I don't know if that's what destroyed my paint shavings. <@kilolima> kek <@kilolima> Think of being in a big house, thousands of miles away from family and friends, with 75 years of family history held, and end of the family line. I am definitely going to pass everything over to my cousins though. <@kilolima> Gotta meet them first.